Game That Guys Run Even When We Don’t Know It


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I have written a lot about dating game here lately. Perhaps we should start a series or something. You know what? A blog series?

That’s game.

Anyway, I have a question for the peanut gallery? What’s the most important thing to a woman?

*numerous people putting their hands where my eyes can see*

You there, with the 8-Ball jacket on?

Stability!?

Good job, padawan. And throw in responsibility and the ability to make them laugh for good measure. While men are more concerned with a woman’s hip-to-arse ratio, flexibility, and how good she is at playing the silent game, women are concerned about security and stability. Men want their women doing nude handstands and women will do it as long as there is a brace in place to keep them up. Women are (generally) concerned about the long yardage whereas men care about the short game. It’s been like this since those two cavemen started Geico in 2 million BC back when the slogan was “Make ‘Em Say Uggggggh”.

*rimshot*

Given what we know about women, I’ve come to the conclusion that men are out here running game on women without even knowing it. Word.Life. Everyday when a man hops up out of his bed and turns his swag on, and looks in his mirror to say what’s up, he’s running game. And do you know why? What do you need to look in the mirror?

Lights. That means he paid his light bill.

Paying bills? That’s game.

I see you looking at me like, yo, Vitamin P, I know you can do better than that. Why don’t you kick a little something for them cars that be bumpin?

Alright.

1) Good Credit

A long time ago, I had this bright idea to get a tshirt made that said, “I’m A Black Man With Good Credit” and on the back put my credit score. I never made that shirt, but if there’s one thing that perks up a woman with a degree it’s a man with a good credit score. Even if I’m more Trey than Songz, I couldn’t lose with a shirt like that. Nothing says stable like a good credit score. By the way, if you’re credit score is roughly your age, reading this blog won’t increase your score. And if Methuselah is reading this, and his credit score is his age, then he’s doing a-ok.

2) Volunteer

You know what warms my heart? A blanket. Do you know what warms many women’s hearts? A man who cares about other people. I used to volunteer at this high school in DC and I can’t tell you how many women were in there helping out. How many Black men? Two of us. It was a veritable buffet of liberal, pot smoking idealist women with big hair and non-profit salaries. Your only requirement is to NOT MESS IT UP. Dudes, if you volunteer, the women will take notice. Especially if it’s not just part of some social organization volunteer requirement. Like do it on your own. Self-love.

3) Be funny

We’ve covered this ad nauseum but a funny man – even a funny looking one – can always meet women. If he’s just funny by nature, he’ll stay winning because women like smiling. It just touches a part of them that makes them want to do happy things and say happy sayings. You become infinitely more attractive by being funny and therefore you have upped your options in the dating pool. That? Is game.

4) Be a good writer

You had to see this one coming. While I can definitely speak for myself and The Champ, I can’t speak on the motivations for every other male blogger. But if you can write well AND are funny…let’s just say it’s a combination that women really enjoy. It’s game. You use the talents you’re born with and women find it appealing. Not me though. Nobody loves Panama Jackson.

^Is called pandering. Mostly because we all know it’s a lie. I’m sexxy beeeyotch.

5) Help an old lady across the street

Game. Set. Match. I’ve ACTUALLY seen a woman give my boy her number because he walked Cicely Tyson across the street. Speaks to responsibility.

6) Own something

No, literally anything. Own a decrepit piece of property. Own a shellfish. Own a shell. It all works because paying taxes is 2/47 of the law, but ownership will keep you winning 12 times out of 8.

7) Be employed

Duh. There’s definitely romance without finance. But you’re not dating a woman who reads without a job. Actually that’s a lie. As long as you have goals women will give you a break. So let’s just say having a job ups your credentials and therefore is game. G-5? Naw son…bingo.

Anyway, good denizens of the jungle no bunny, what other game do men run without even knowing it?

(I think I might do this woman’s version too, just to be fair. EOE and what not.)


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